Everyone feels frustrated every now and then, this is very normal. Frustration could come from other’s actions or our reaction to situations.
In many cases, this feeling is short-lived and as part of the numerous temporary feelings we have each day, changes as the situation changes, hence is no cause for alarm. But in some cases, an individual could be found exhibiting a long-lasting frustration which could pose a threat to the physical and psychological being of the person.
WHAT IS FRUSTRATION?
Frustration refers to a feeling of anger or annoyance not directed at anything or anyone in particular but rather an unpleasant situation. It is felt when one’s motivations are blocked or it seems like the efforts invested on a thing is not yielding.
Frustration is a response to any kind of stress which could be physical or psychological, obstacles, unmet expectations or setbacks; which could as a result of having a long day at work, unforeseen happenings, unplanned deadlines etc.
In the case of long-term conditions, frustration could have adverse effects on a person’s mental and physical health leading to uncontrolled anger, increased stress level, demotivation and discouragement.
Individuals experience and express frustration differently with the difference being dependent on coping skills and level of resilience.
CAUSES OF FRUSTRATION
Frustration could be as a result of internal factors, personal traits or beliefs and might as well be of external factors. The constant in the feeling of frustration is stress either mentally or physically, and this could be experienced in different areas of our lives.
One or more of the following are the possible culprits of stress and frustration:
- Unexpected turn of events
- Struggling finances
- Unresolved conflicts
- Failing or unhealthy relationships
- Unhealthy work standards
- Unmet deadlines
- Unfulfilled sexual desires
- Mental disorders such as Depression and Post Traumatic Syndrome Disorder (PTSD)
SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
Individuals have certain expectations on activities they indulge in including sexual activities. When these expectations are unrealistic and unmet, frustration could set in from the dissatisfaction felt.
Sexual frustration refers to the agitation caused by a discontented sexual activity which stems from unrealized sexual desires either in terms of the quality or quantity. It could be caused by sexual dysfunction,lack of sexual activity, unfulfilled sexual desires and even displeasure with oneself or appearance.
The myth that sexual frustration is only experienced by individuals with high sexual drive due to the inability of their partner to satisfy their huge appetite has been debunked with research and studies conducted on different groups of individuals that are sexually frustrated including those who testified to having normal sexual urges.
While sexual frustration can be expressed differently amongst individuals, it could occur in anyone and as shown from research on how sexual activities impact health, the study suggests a link between sexual and mental health, and how each affects the other.
Sexual frustration has been revealed to have negative effects on the general health including manifestation of depressive signs or involvement in risky and unhealthy sexual activities in order to get over the frustration, which could in turn heighten the risk of sexually transmitted infection and other diseases
SIGNS OF SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
Sexual Frustration is presented during studies with different signs and measures amongst groups of individuals but certain signs associated with sexual frustration includes
- Feeling sexually disconnected from one’s partner
- Being at loggerhead with one’s partner over the topic of sex
- Having a low libido and less sex generally
- Lack of or reduced interest in sexual activities
- Continuously feeling restless and irritable
- Eating or drinking as a coping mechanism
- Feeling unheard as regards sexual desires
- Reduction in productivity due to mental stress and frustration at work
- Watching too many Porn or indulging in risky sexual activities.
HOW TO DEAL WITH FRUSTRATION?
Since feeling frustrated is not foreign in our daily activities and we can’t totally put a stop to such emotional response, it is important to figure out how to deal with the feeling of frustration and reduce feeling angry and frustrated at every little inconvenience. The first measure includes identifying the sources of the frustration to know what to work upon, though this can be challenging as frustration could be as a result of collective factors. Afterwards, some or all of the following measures could be employed:
- Be emotionally intelligent: emotional intelligence is the ability to identify, utilize and manage the emotions of oneself and others. Having a high EI contributes to how one deals with frustration, this can help you give a more appropriate response to people’s actions and circumstances that could lead to frustration.
Having less expectations from decisions made by other people which is beyond your control is necessary to avoid getting angry and frustrated constantly, while you might have no control over people’s actions, you decide the way you react to such actions and how you allow it affect you.
2. Be optimistic: the complexity of a situation or job depends on your view and thought patterns. Getting frustrated might also be from a negative point of view where we see challenges as being beyond our control. Learning to see challenges from a brighter view of learning and development rather than what you’ve been able to achieve can help to get rid of the feeling of frustration at work or over a project and help you build resilience which reduces the effect of stress.
Learning to not only focus on what you can’t do or don’t do well enough but to be grateful for the things you have also is an optimistic view of the situation.
- Practice some relaxing exercise: Breathe! This first line of action is a natural stress relief. Since most feelings of frustration are as a result of stress or being overwhelmed, trying a breathing exercise would be great to supply your brain with oxygen, help you clear your mind and keep you calm. While your mind is in a haze of turmoil, take a deep breath and slowly release it. You could also practice meditation or yoga which helps clear the mind and release built up tension.
- Vent: penting up your feelings would only lead to you being more frustrated and choked, letting out your frustrations is not just healthy but also necessary to keep your mental state intact. This has also been proven as a good means of reducing mental stress and frustration.
- Get outside: it’s important that you leave the environment surrounding your frustration, most times we want to figure out a solution to solve the cause of the frustration, while this is not bad in itself but running away for a short while is a better option.
- Take breaks: managing stress is another perfect means to manage frustration and taking breaks in-between work is the best way to do so. While going about a short or long-time assignment, delegate time to go off work and do something more cheerful to give your mind the boost it needs. Psychologists have proposed that a deliberate distraction gives a boost to productivity particularly when the task is mentally demanding.
- Change your life pattern: you might also want to make some adjustments to your activities and how you go about them. This involves cutting down on responsibilities that could be promoting stress in your life while investing in those that leaves you more refreshed. It could also require you getting out of unhealthy relationships that could be causing you stress or becoming assertive as to demanding what you want or how you want others to relate with you.
- Building resilience: Resilience is the ability to bounce back after experiencing a setback. This is like stress-proof which helps us to manage and overcome stress better. One of the ways to build resilience is to understand that change and unexpected turn of events are normal, not your fault or because you lack the abilities.
- Set realistic goals: frustration sets in when things don’t go as you plan or want. Sometimes, this could be because your expectations are unrealistic, while inspirations and ambitions are important to drive, it is necessary to have a healthy appetite for them. Rather than having huge goals accompanied with a lot of mental stress, setting smaller chunks of Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant and Time-based (SMART) goals helps in building momentum as well as increasing the feeling of fulfillment.
- Remove the Stressor: in instances where frustration is as a result of problems in your relationships either a conflict, failing relationship or unfulfilled sexual desires, talking with the person(s) involved would be a good decision. Making your pain known to the other person would help in addressing the issue which would reduce the frustration involved as well as help you find a solution to the problem. Finding other alternatives to boost one’s finances and delegating tasks when necessary can be employed also to alleviate frustration.
When managed and leveraged upon properly, frustration though a negative feeling can be an important tool for personal growth and development, and serve as a driving tool towards success.
Feeling frustrated is not out of the ordinary, however, in cases of constant feeling of frustration, there could be an underlying mental condition causing it and there might be a need to see a therapist. Today, there are numerous online platforms where you can discover the right professional for your mental health needs, and Calmerry therapy stands out as one such platform. Calmerry is an online platform that collaborates with licensed psychologists and therapists, offering a diverse and extensive array of therapy services to choose from.
